Monday, August 17, 2009

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Romantic weather and happy day(s)…

Oh Yes. Today certainly is romantic. Thanks to the beautiful weather.

Cloudy Blanket of Grey, a mildly cold wet breeze, pinhead drizzles … Just awesome!

Feels very European!

And a drive on the ORR, zooming in 80s, with nice songs from VettaiyaaduVelaiaadu & Unnale Unnale!

:) Gets be back to the dreamy old days, bitten by the travel bug … carefree and fearless!

And it was a happy nice weekend @ home too… Thanks to the kiddo with his cute chirpy blabbering & all that non stop jumping around. Ssssssssssoooo adorable!

Monday, July 20, 2009

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Is it a crime to be a person not easily convinced?

Well, the question is about being penalised for being a person not easily convinced with things that happen around.

Be it at the office or at home! (Ahem! Looks like am on that ‘being the old bulldog’ path well in my 30’s than in my 60’s)

Am kinda dazed even as i write this.

{ Whenever am forced into a situation to think the way am doing now, this is the first question pops out to myself – “Am i what (even partly) that what i expect others to be?”

and me thinks that am not very unreasonable about that – as i don’t comment on things which i fundamentally don’t practice! And even when i do miss and get a googlee, am quick to accept & take the value out of it.

}

Oh, how much i yearn to be among people with fire! and be convinced about what am listening to and doing about!

Who’d be devoting all their smartness & intelligence in not finding ways to evade a task or challenge but to be game enough & have the guts to take the bull by the horns!

Who’d be not that cunning and conniving to not do things yet want the fruit of the same or even worse – being a ram (as in shaking the heads in acceptance) and sleeping over things.

Who’d not be whining about time and the complexity – even before giving a whole hearted try!

Who’d expect a pat as if they’ve done something great by getting the bag of garbage from their own homes to the bin out of the door?

imageWho can shamelessly point others’ faults while they themselves lie in the reeky stench of their own faults! - B**t***s!

And there’s this kind of wise ass cracks who wants to stick their neck out (always! if not ever) and be the god of finding faults while they don’t move a nail themselves!

If things aren’t the way they should be – ask and more importantly come up to the table & be bold enough to suggest a way out of the shit & follow the agreed solutions – walk the talk to reality!

Depend on others for every damn thing – and feel proud about their smartness - even for cutting vegetables?

Get a life losers – move up! It does hurt to be snubbed on the face with all your intelligence employed for the sake of nothing! Use it elsewhere! Make a difference!

Bull to Mediocrity!

{Please Imagine the gesture yourself! :) or may be i’d fish out an image for the same!

}

No, i’ve got to vent it out somewhere, sometime!

and This is it!

I feel so f*****g handicapped, not usually, but certainly in the state of mind that am in now!

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

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Feels good to be …. Alive! :)

Yes – Really! After all these medicines & visits to the doctor and the uncertainties, coming to the office and getting back to do the routines is like … bliss! seriously!

A subtle reminder on how we take the life for granted!

Its good to be … Alive & Kicking! :) :)

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

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A Time when Buddha would have killed himself…

So ironic that a single seat of power displaces the quotient of right & wrong! When an army massacres it becomes an act to protect its homeland & suppress the insurgents & cleansing & what not - while the same being done without the seat of power is rebellion and terrorism and what not!

Spite to thee – to that ethnic majority – a heartless mass of barbarians acting on the fury of ethnicity  – calling themselves the followers of a noble saint who loved peace and could never stand brutality let alone to kill a life form.

Not that such a thing is happening or happened elsewhere in the world – but this – this is happening to your own people. The ones who speak your language – and hardly a few hours’ away from you!

Sunday, May 17, 2009

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A Different kind of loneliness…

I have it all…

A generous share of happiness, an emotional rollercoaster of a family, equal share of concerns & issues… and the most precious of all, a rational & inquisitive mind – ever in search of knowledge and the ability to contemplate and accept, with a heart that places others before self!

It’s like being in multiple planes … of existence all at the same time.

  1. A very physical & emotional web of people -  family, friends & relations – a mixed conservative arena with well set bounds!
  2. Another plane of objective creativity – work, futuristic things et. al. with no bounds whatsoever.
  3. And finally this plane of self-realization, a space for myself where am left alone myself and with my thoughts. This is where it happens … the more i realize, the more i look inwards, the more lonelier i feel. All the books & writings point to a very simple fact of finding god within self and experience the oneness.And i just want that …. No more! But, am not even able to feel let alone “experience” – not even the distant presence of the vast oneness within me!

That calls for a still mind perhaps! :( In which case, am not even a toddler in that direction).

Oh but, how i would love to have a companion through this journey if not for the guiding spirit!

But something tells me, that I'll find what am looking for… if only i keep myself from straying away from the focus!

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

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From akilan & nasar on the death howls of eelam…

கடைசிச் சவம் வீழ்ந்த பின்பு

கட்டாயம் அறிவிக்கப்படும்

வெற்றி பெற்ற கடவுளின் பெயர்!

- s.a. nasar

(From the article on akilan’s book – from the anantha vikatan 2nd March Issue)

Heart wrenching!

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

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What a following! :D hehehe…

image

Okie! My day is made! Thanks President! ;) That’s so considerate of you in the midst of all that saving the world – Am Honored!

ROFL!!!!

Thursday, February 12, 2009

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Tips for tweeting…

(from: http://realestatezebra.com/5-rules-for-using-twitter)

1) Don’t tell me what you are doing– tell me what you are thinking.

2) Don’t tell me where you are going– tell me what moves you.

3) Don’t just tell me you wrote a new blog post– tell me why you did it.

4) Don’t just notify– engage and inspire.

5) Make sure you follow, but also try to lead.

On second thoughts, this does apply for blogging as well!

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

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Windows Live Writer…

Did i mention i started using windows live writer for blogging? Well, i should agree its a cool enough tool :) very much word like!

Nice features & simple to use!

More the use, more am i liking it.

Monday, February 09, 2009

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Rather painful times and tidings…

Time for change? Not a question of choice anymore! :(

Being black/white and honestly expressive driven by the old value system - in this ***ked up world isn’t going to help me for sure! Hard realization. But life has to go on… and i

  1. Have to learn to contain myself (which would be having an almost killing effect on me – given the expressive person that i am) and mask my emotions & expressions! :(
  2. Have to learn to talk less! Mask More! (More than any logical reasoning one gives me, me & my style could simply be a threat to the long time pond dwellers!) – Roughly put, its hard to convince me in an argument/discussion unless i really really see the value! :(
  3. Have to draw the long pending tough line of separation between work & life and learn to live with it! Work has been the key driving factor so long in my career and life. Now this heartbreaking separation has to be done, to keep me sane and not to *be reactive*! my foot! :(
  4. Have to learn to fall in line with the flow, and allow myself to accept the idiosyncrasies and selfish attitudes driven by lack of sincerity and morality that am surrounded around! Not being a salmon anymore but one in the mass of a tuna shoal! (Ya, ya, but with the kind of shoal lacking the goodness / purpose of the need to be shoaling!)

All of a sudden i feel … terribly… Lonely! Is this another learning curve in life?

A Fish out of place!

A Fish almost heart broken and out of Water!

or…

remembering Tevye and his dialogues with god in  the fiddler on the roof…

Sometimes I wonder, when it gets too quiet up there, if You are thinking, "What kind of mischief can I play on My friend Tevye?

I know, I know. I am your chosen puppet. But, once in a while, can't You choose someone else?

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

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Not today either!

Sucks! Am yet in office …. I wanted badly to leave home by 6! Just i wrapped up my tasks, i got this last minute bug assigned to my name – a critical one at that!

Thanks a ton – dearest – am stuck here! Every other soul has gone! and especially the old timers – they punctually keep up their time – at least for going home if not for the deliverables!

That makes me more resolved to blindly shutdown whatever tasks i have by 6 sharp and head home!

Tomorrow – Tomorrow Definitely!

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

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Oh yeah! before i sign off…

This is *really* something i wanted to blog before i sign off for the day!

20090202

Location : Loo!

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Yippie…Inching towards the 200 mark in my linked in network … 1 more to go! ;)

Yup..Yup..Yup

Numbers are nice for once!

Perhaps, i should set a target to myself to make this 300+ in another 3 months’ time! Time to get all known PICians to LinkedIn. hehe!

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Perhaps am overworking…

Feels like am on a overdrive these days… Just realize am at office in the morning and before i feel like going home, it turns dark.

Mmmmm, could it be the constant irritant effect on having to spend most of my productive energy in devising strategies warding the innocently smart maneuvers and about how to handle brats and smartasses and laggards and the really-have-no-clue-what’s-going-around me’s and getting things done … well or doing things myself! Whew!

Bring in change or Be the Change or Just Change :D Finally, i’ve to adopt the last – god forbid!

Oops! its already 7.45 and i had promised myself that i’ll head home by 6. Stupid me!

off me goes!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

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Need to blog more...

My blogging frequency has reduced to almost once a month! bad - should be doing the good things more often... :)

Monday, January 05, 2009

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நீயா? நானா?

yesterday i was watching the episode of நீயா? நானா? in vijay tv. It was an interesting topic - Is Astrology true/false? Can and should one believe in Astrology?
The Pro astrology team was lacking any strong speakers and was in a pathetic shape to take on the *so called logical* questions of the other side.
It was a pity watching how they were being taken for a ride. (Unfortunately, this alone proves how weak and deep was the expertise :( )

As such am very neutral when it comes to this topic of Astrology. As a study, i have been awed by the length and breadth of rules, calculations and combinations of various factors and elements involved in the study of astrology. It isn't a conjured junk of vomit of imagination. Nope! whoever it was in the ancient past, who have come up with the study of astrology aren't any lesser genius(es). And this point was never emphasized by the pro Astrology group. Pity! They failed to set the strong base and thus in answering the actual questions.


Astrology by itself might remain a perpetually debated area of study, but it is certainly marred by the people who practice it. In this case, because of the lack of the practitioners' expertise and understanding of this vast ocean of a subject, the subject itself is given a black name. This was accepted well by the pro Astrology group themselves.

As i was watching - a doctor, who was on the other side was attacking with logical questions & his own interpretations of why astrology should not be believed. And discussing these they deviated to the subject of questioning the study of astrology itself with all the tell tale stupidness of the *learned ones* who wouldn't accept anything that they cannot fathom or understand with their puny little minds! This is what got me furious. Learned Fools!

Even a cursory peek in to the structure, relations, rules, factors, permutations and combinations & the calculations that make the basics of astrology, should really trigger a thought process in any decent man who'd like to call themselves learned, intelligent and wise. Yes! One should first learn to identify, inspect and respect any area of study (even the ones they dislike) to be fair. Failing which, i'd not qualify such a person fit to argue/discuss - as it would be foolish to do with a fool. They'd systematically drag us to their level and beat us! :)


Coming back, I had this itch of taking the same case against a proven scientific area - medicine.
  • The human body is a marvelous piece of engineering.
  • What more, it can heal itself.
  • Medicines are but helpers to this healing mechanism and they don't themselves are the cure *always*!
  • They stimulate and help the body to heal itself.
  • The ingredients of these medicines - herbs, minerals & metals - the potions etc., - well, nobody invented them by a flash of vision in their heads, while they were in the loo!
  • These were based on the observations, trial and error of research over the ages - by countless practitioners across the world.
  • In-fact, doctors don't know the roots & causes of many an ailment that affects a human body today.
  • And there are so many diseases which can't be cured either.
  • And to add to the pity, they don't even see the ailment holistically....
  • We have specialists... who treat individual organs of the body and forget the root cause - they treat the symptoms (I'd consider this more dangerous - Its like suppressing unhandled exceptions)!
  • Alas, but there are far and few who master the art of identifying, understanding, analysing & tracing back the symptoms to nail a particular ailment and provide treatment accordingly.
  • In medicine, the same symptom could be caused by various factors/ailments.
  • So, it comes to the doctor/practitioner to interpret the symptoms and provide treatment.
  • Now, which doctor do i trust? Two doctors interpret and prescribe medicines to the same ailment differently.
  • And today, we have ultra modern - sophisticated equipments, which take pictures of the body to help these practitioners diagnose... and make more money too.
So, my question is how reliable are medicine & doctors - and - how different are astrology & astrologers from medicine, on the grounds of expertise and application.
How much of medicine is left to hope, belief and prayer and how different is astrology?
When the question of which astrologer to trust, the same question arises to me - which doctor to trust?
Atleast astrology impacts directly on hope and belief of a human but in case of medicine, it directly affects the machinary that's called the human body.

The world has its share of great astrologers who are experts and predict accurate having their basic concepts strong and apply their knowledge with passion ... and great doctors who are experts in their area of work.

For either case, what matters fundamentally is the knowldge, concepts, depth of understanding, practice, passion towards their chosen subject and above all *Experience* (which comes only with time and instances posing challenges to be overcome).

I would rather summarize - we rather restrain ourselves from opinionating and be driven by lacklustre experiences to drive at conclusions on any study. Seldom is the science/art and their principles which are wrong - they are but an accumulated knowledge source of various minds woven through the fabric time - and to question them, is a privilege that i personally feel, we neither deserve nor are eligible/capable.

It is but the human touch - the practitionars of such science and art who might go wrong.
In this fast paced world, we jump to conclusions without due credit and contemplation, without analysis (or with wrong analysis - thanks to the poisioned mind which thinks they know it all!) and without realizing that everything is relative in this world! (Yes! All's relative in this world - Even right and wrong - true and false - they are all relative to one's levels of knowledge)

Bottomline: It is we who are wrong... Our beliefs and understanding is half baked... We make the wrong choices... We are the ones who can't accept things as they happen! By questioning others and in the name of "பகுத்தறிவு" - we are just trying to find a hole in the sink to let out the filth and intellegently convincing/making believe ourselves superior ... Superior Fools!

One who has questions will search ...
and find answers...
and when he knows in his heart - reaching a point of realization that he doesn't have the bandwidth for ascertaining "right" and "wrong" - while analysing the answer...
He learns to accept. To accept that he is limited by his knowledge.
Once accepted the same question would not arise again...
he'd be filled with peace and silence. :)

And He'd be filled with a different question the next time.
This time his earlier acceptance would have enhanced his knowledge...
Leading him to the next levels of realization...
And the layers of life, the levels of realization will unfold as that of an onion.

Finally, it all leads to - whether you accept or not!
Acceptance is the base for true knowledge.

Monday, December 01, 2008

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Outlook journal

Started using outlook journal to keep track of my time spent on daily tasks.
:) not that am getting very organized et al., but this is the outcome / hard realization out of the pain involved in filling up the timesheets for almost three months in a bunch. I don't think i would like to scuffle in my outlook and try to deduce what i was working on a daily basis - over the past three months one more time ever! whew!
Pain in the bum!

Better get wiser by tracking things as is and when!

Friday, November 21, 2008

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A sweet and sour day!

:( A Very bad start to the day, today! One of the rare moments when you feel like vanishing off - at the whim of a thought, or to get the "Click" remote and rewind...pause...change things!

Whew! There are some things - which details - i'd never get myself to express or share publicly. But only whine about that something nasty happened! Today's scenes were one such showcase!

But i should say - i survived the blast! Left out dazed and dizzy for sure but i could stay detached. Am surprised about that myself!

And once at office, things changed - change of moods... work, and am fine!

but something within has been impacted ... a hit deep down for sure. i will get to realize that over a period of time!

already feeling aloof, detached and lost! But may be this time - its for my own good! ;)

Monday, September 29, 2008

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Live to make an impact!

Live to make an impact!
Its like a vegetable to have lived long enough and did nothing but to melt away the days in routine!
Make the living itself a meaningful purpose, than to run behind knowing the purpose of life.

Well, thats something for myself from myself, in a flash of motivational thought.
Yes, am on the way back to finding my good old high spirited self.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

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a must read for all architects : http://ping.fm/EiWT1 ;)